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> From: JamBabee@aol.com
> To: Homespect@aol.com
> Cc: dolanb@mascorp.com; dykstrav@mascorp.com; Disney@gte.net;
TJ007@MAIL.GTE.NET; StaceyL@Photodisc.com; ProfTim@Speakeasy.org;
Heidah@Safeco.com; Trixanna@aol.com; GEEMAJO@aol.com; Slowknit@aol.com;
constantb@mascorp.com; JamBabee@juno.com
> Subject: Fwd: Fw: Danger: New Virus Warning
> Date: Friday, February 13, 1998 7:45 PM
>
>Danger: New Virus Warning
If you receive an e-mail with a subject line of "Badtimes," delete it
immediately WITHOUT reading it. This is the most dangerous e-mail
virus yet.
It will rewrite your hard drive. Not only that, but it will scramble
any disks that are even close to your computer. It will re-calibrate
your refrigerator's coolness setting so all your ice cream melts and milk
curdles.
It will demagnetize the strips on all your credit cards, reprogram
your AATM harmonics access code, screw up the tracking on your VCR and
use subspace field harmonics to scratch any CDs you try to play.
It will give your ex-boy/girlfriend your new phone number. It will
mix antifreeze into your fish tank. It will drink all your beer and
leave its dirty socks on the coffee table when there's company coming over.
It
will hide your car keys when you are late for work and interfere with your
car radio so that you hear only static while stuck in traffic.
Badtimes will make you fall in love with a hardened paedophile. It will
give you nightmares about circus midgets. It will replace your shampoo
with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine, all while dating your current
boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing their hotel rendezvous to
your Visa card.
It will seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if she is dead,
such is the power of Badtimes, it reaches out beyond the grave to sully
those
things we hold most dear.
Badtimes will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the toilet seat
up and leave the hairdryer plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub.
It will wantonly remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows
and refill your skimmed milk with whole.
It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to
behold.
It is also a rather interesting shade of mauve. These are just a few
signs. Be very, very afraid. PLEASE FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO
EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!! Virus Central!! Ain't technology great?