My grandfather's marriage to my grandmother Amanda is celebrated in his
diary which I have published on my web site. One thinks that 100 years ago
the circumstances would not be conducive for such a relationship. The
common thought is that women were oppressed and badly treated... at least
more than today. Irony often works that way. The truth is more simple and
more complex. If one reads between the lines in the diary it is easy to
see that my grandfather not only loved his 'little girl' but he respected
what she contributed to his life. And further, the very existence of their
family required both man and woman for its very existence. Perhaps the
fact that my grandfather lived through several very bad years after his
first stepfather died had something to do with his own choices. Whatever.
You might find an interesting read here Brett. I know I still turn to it
in times when I feel low.
My own experience in marriage found that my role as mother and homemaker
was not respected by my spouse who never seemed satisfied with my 1/2 of
the contract even though he could never articulate his dissatisfaction.
Was this a reflection of society? I do not think so. He has found a mate
who meets his needs and he hers. I am happy for that fact.
But your message cuts a bit as while I believe in it as an ideal, not many
seem to be able to achieve it in this day and age.
Regards
Marie
<http://www.geocities.com/~mfos/>
At 02:46 PM 1/18/98 -0500, you wrote:
>What then is the chance of survival for one who chooses to *dance alone*?
>
>Regards,
>Anonymous
>
>
>List,
>
>There is a fusion and crystalization of each of a mated pair such that they
>become the environmental standard by which the future generation must aspire
>toward; that is, they are perfected as individuals, purified through trial
>by fire...they become more decisive, more sure of themselves, more
>completely themselves (this in an objective sense...or rather they become
>like objects with distinct characteristics).
Marie
Marie L. Foster
<http://www.geocities.com/~mfos/>