hell-kite
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AW: virus: admission
« on: 2004-11-20 16:26:48 » |
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Greetings Sebby,
like Casey (and apparently Joe, too), I would probably start at whether or not you are yourself satisfied with your "dreamy" outlook on life. In case you are - say, you actually deal with Western civilisation's demands well enough (i.e., can make your living in it) and just prefer to spend the rest of the day "dreaming" -, I suppose the relationship is still very good, isn't it? After all, you have other people to talk to, and "relationship" doesn't imply sharing every thought or interest. As long as you do share SOME interests, have comparable moral standards and - maybe an important, but maybe overrated indicator - have a healthy sex life, that, err, sufficient, is it not?
On the other hand, if Laura's practical orientation is a source of unhappiness for you because, say, it reminds you of your own shortcomings (such as, well, she would have applied to this and that a long time ago and I still can't get going), or because - by some psychologically twisted comparison - her happiness get's in the way of yours, the matter is different (one of the reasons I broke up with my girlfriend recently, or recently it seems...).
Does she ever complain about your dreaminess? Of your abstract thinking, instead of staying on the ground? Of escapism? Does she ever complain about, or does it ever occur to you, that you are not enough in touch with yourself? (nb, I am not implying you are, for I do not know you at all - nor her, nor the context; actually, nothing...)
Did you ever talk about this?
Sorry, but I guess I can't really help...
Nevertheless best regards Björn
-----Ursprüngliche Nachricht----- Von: owner-virus@lucifer.com [mailto:owner-virus@lucifer.com]Im Auftrag von Dr Sebby Gesendet: Samstag, 20. November 2004 14:17 An: virus@lucifer.com Betreff: virus: admission
....alright, dont skin me alive for saying this, but i suspect i am in a relationship problem. this is about the only place i feel free to disclose such personal crap...the virian confessional chamber. here is the situation: laura(snoopy) is a very nice girl, very kind, caring, loving, gorgeous, affectionate, sexual(few b.j.'s but that's not too much of an oddity amongst women in this country), attentive, playful, trustworthy(a big quality let's admit)and devoted. she's 5'3" and 100 lbs...sounds like a perfect woman right? well how can i say this then without sounding like a bastard?...i have become increasingly aware of the fact that she and i have very different outlooks on life. both her parents were struggling immigrants who succeeded in raising 5 daughters in brooklyn NY...hats off to them for that...and they are still together after all these years. but as a result, i sometimes feel that she and i have very different takes on life in general. she seems to focus exclusively on immediate concerns and the nuts and bolts of living....to the extent that it is nearly impossible for me to have an interesting conversation with her...she is interested in talking about immediate issues...from important things like bills and such to other issues like, "that person knows this person, who knows this friend of my friend"...or "it's really warm out today"...or "this person said this about this person"...all of these unknowns being people or things which we arent connected with at all. i, on the other hand tend to live in the more dreamy side of life...i like to b.s. about politics, philosophy, interpretive analysis of history(recent and present) and any variety of 'what if' situations...all of which are likely useless in a real sense, but i love them. as a result, i am becoming increasingly bored of our combination...and i'm really not sure what to do. is this an insurmountable problem? if we could pick and choose the qualities in a mate that we would like to marry, i would pull about 80% of her...but the remaining 20% is a big one...intellectual compatibility. what does the virus engine think?
advice?
DrSebby. "Courage...and shuffle the cards".
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Othello. Thou dost conspire against thy friend, Iago, If thou but think'st him wrong'd, and mak'st his ear A stranger to thy thoughts.
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